Censored Senses

Photo by Milada Vigerova

You censor my senses.

You tell me to close my eyes,

Hiding your sins in my sight.

You tell me to stop seeing.


You tell me to close my eyes,

And carry on as if nothing happened.

You tell me to stop seeing

The torture that you inflict.


And I carry on as if nothing happened.

I ignore all the warnings.

The torture that you inflict

Has become a part of my life.


I ignore all the warnings;

The suspicion and the questioning.

It has become a part of my life

To lie with ease.


Your suspicions and questions;

They have killed my spirit.

I lie with ease,

Because the truth would destroy me.


My spirit is dead.

I cannot see myself in the mirror.

The truth in my eye torments me.

So I close my eyes; censor my senses.


Note: As I mentioned before, I took an online poetry course called “How Writers Write Poetry 2015”, which finished last week. This poem is in a form that I learnt about, called the pantoum. The structure of a pantoum is as follows: There are four lines in a stanza, and the second and fourth lines of a stanza become the first and third lines of the next stanza. The first line of the poem is typically also the last line of the poem. Of all the things that I learnt in this course, this is one of my favourites. 🙂


The New Life

Engineering student. Engineer.

So, the last semester is over. College is officially done. I don’t know how I feel about that really. I suppose I would have felt more of a change had I gone to a different city. But since that hasn’t happened, I guess it’s not really sinking in that my student life is over.

I finished my last semester doing an off-campus internship, and am currently on a break. The past few months have not been easy. Adjusting to not being a student is a difficult process. Top it off with other personal disappointments, and you have the perfect recipe for becoming “mopey”.

However, I have been trying my very best to not let that happen. In order to overcome my funk, and the consequent writer’s block, I have been taking an online poetry course. It’s called “How Writers Write Poetry 2015“, and is conducted by Iowa university. It was suggested to me by one of my favorite professors, who knows that I enjoy writing. 🙂

It’s definitely a great experience since I’ve never taken a formal course in creative writing before. I have learnt about some really interesting forms, and I hope to add them to my writing practices. I will be bombarding this blog with a lot of poetry in the coming few weeks.

On the whole, I’ve noticed that this blog has seen less of personal blog posts and more of poetry. I know the reason. It’s easier to hide behind poetry and other creative writing than write what’s really on the mind. And there has been a lot on my mind lately. When I started blogging, one of my goals was to make this blog reflect a part of me. And cutting out the personal stories would be detrimental to that. So, I will be making a deliberate attempt to communicate more on this blog.

I know that I haven’t been exactly regular with the posting, and I’m glad that the readers have stuck with me in spite of that. This is my effort to start engaging more, and begin anew.

Photo by Tim Mossholder